Hammond blames Blair, Henry the Eighth and Boadicea for Brexit

Chancellor of the Exchequer talks bollocks

Chancellor of the Exchequer (and therefore the man responsible for the spending of your taxes) has blamed Brexit on former Prime Minister Tony Blair, former king Henry the VIII and Celtic tribal chief Boadicea.

"If Tony Blair hadn't let all those dirty foreigners in from Eastern European," he said, "then Brexit would never have happened. And as for that Henry, he had those foreign wives, didn't he? That Spanish one and the horse that he married from Flanders, which I now know isn't the character from the Simpsons."

When challenged on his assertion that blame could also be laid at the feet of the famous female leader of the Iceni tribe who died around 61 AD, he replied, "I'm not really sure, but if you give me few minutes I'll come up with something."

The people that Mr Hammond said were "most definitely not responsible in any way whatsover" were Tory Prime Minister David Cameron who gave the people of the UK a referendum in the first place or the Tory Eurosceptic back benchers who insisted on it.

"Just because they spent years pressuring the government to leave the EU doesn't mean that they can be held responsible for finally succeeding," he declared. "I'm the Chancellor of the Exchequer, but that doesn't mean I'm going to be held responsible for anything, not when there are historical figures I can blame."

Political analyst Dee Prest said that this was no surprise. "The Conservative Party have had a long history of blaming every significant blunder on the previous Labour government. Ever since Mrs Thatcher, who just never admitted that anything was a mistake, every Conservative Party leader has blamed everything that they have done wrong on the last Labour government, no matter how long they have had in power to put things right."

Labour leader Jeremy Corbyn has yet to comment for fear of putting his foot in it.