White House plan to rent out Trump to Premiers who 'need to look good'.

The White House Administration has announced a new plan to capitalise on President Trump's apparent lack of experience and ability by renting him out to the leaders of other countries who are suffering at home and need to make a positive impression.

"This week alone, we have seen the Irish Prime Minister and the German Chancellor both stand up alongside the President and look like true political powerhouses in comparison," chief White House salesman Gus Dealermann pointed out at the launch of the programme. "Simply standing alongside our President makes other world leaders seem that much greater in stature. So, if you're a complete failure on domestic issues and don't have and independent referendum to call on every time you need to distract the electorate from your shortcomings, just get in touch and, for a modest fee, we'll have you in a press conference with the US President and looking the best that you ever have."

The programme charges a little extra for discreet eye-rolling opportunities and offers up special deals on the chance to rubbish the President's faltering stance on immigration.

When asked what the President himself thought of this plan, Dealermann said that he knew nothing about it since they hadn't advertised on Fox News or during the children's hour on other channels. "He doesn't seem to notice when other leaders are openly mocking him, so I doubt that he'll notice this."

The only person to have signed on to the programme and not to have benefitted was Britain's own Theresa May, due to the fact that she was so desperate to get on the President's good side that she ended up looking like an abandoned puppy.

"We can't help everyone," Dealermann pointed out, sadly.