Oscars to run extra show just for In Memoriam reel

It will look fancier on the night

The American Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences is to run a second Oscars awards show this year so that it can fit in the traditional clips of all the famous people from Hollywood who have died since last year.

With 2016 decimating the ranks of Tinseltown's finest, and 2017 not looking to change the formula, the show would have to be extended for an extra two hours to fit in the tribute to them all. Since the show is already a bum-numbing length, the show's bosses have decided to run an entirely separate show to make sure that nobody  famous actually dies during the reel's running time.

Speaking at the Academy's headquarters, a press spokesman said, "We have lost a large number of beloved friends this past year, including the Star Wars opening scroll.

The extra show will be directed by Michael Bay.

"Which is only fitting," the spokesperson commented, "since he has brought about the death of narrative cinema."